The Ministry of Holding Space

 

The Gospel of Mark is written in three acts: the first act in Galilee, the second has Jesus traveling about, and the third takes place in Jerusalem. Mark 9 is in the second act. The second act especially is written in individual moments or standalone events. There are independent stories of miraculous events and healings, discussions with disciples, and the sharing now and then of a parable. This section has us travel all over the map.

 

Our reading today first has us in Galilee with Jesus and the disciples. Jesus does not want anyone to know. Jesus and the disciples journey into the region away from the towns because Jesus has serious things to share with the disciples. Jesus does not want to be interrupted or overheard.

Secondly, the reading has us visit Capernaum. The disciples are with Jesus, and Jesus speaks with them. Different from the region of Galilee journey, here they are not alone. We know this because Jesus draws a child into their midst, which suggests there are others around too. It is okay for others to overhear the conversation.

 

What drew my attention this week was the use of specific places for specific tasks and ministry.

The second act of the Gospel of Mark illustrates that there are different messages and ways of communicating and or acting for various contexts and audiences. Individuals have an array of needs and are at unique points in their faith journey requiring intentionally focused care.

I had a conversation with a person this week who shared with me a profound “God-moment.” God appeared at an auspicious time for this person, in a moment of choice where choosing temptation would have been life-destructing. To get their attention God appeared in an over-the-top manner, that for most of us would be so bizarre and risqué we would not have seen God in it at all. Yet, for this person, their personality, this was THE way they woke up to God’s presence. Knowing the person, it made perfect sense to me that God’s specific message to them was delivered in the extraordinarily outrageous!

This week I also reflected on the conversations I have with people, specifically those I’ve talked with at the Loneliness Café. I get all kinds of ‘God questions’ or ‘Bible themed queries,’ theological questions and the like. Although the questions might be identical, the answer or reply has never been the same. In fact, sometimes my conversation with one person, would be the exact opposite of what I would say to another. What I have said to you, may not be what I have counseled the person sitting beside you.

I have my own way of teaching and practicing Lutheran theology. I have working definitions for sin, forgiveness, grace, the cross, kindom… these are descriptions that come from my core beliefs. But when in the world, although holding true to the core, how I express the message changes depending on the conversation, the context, the relationship, and where a person is on their journey.

 

With the rise of open conversations around mental health, more practitioners share ways that ordinary people can support the mental health and wellbeing of others. A highly recommended practice is to hold space for others.

PsychologyToday.com says that holding space is:

In addition to the safe environment and full presence, holding space involves listening attentively. The listener is present for the speaker’s experience, does not make the conversation about them, does not shut down difficult conversation, and does not shy away from strong feelings. 

-Psychology Today. Com May25, 2023

Likewise, HolisticeWellnessPractice.com says:

Show up for someone, be fully present, without judgement as you sit with that person through their difficult time – March 28, 2023 holisticwelnesspractice.com

 

The independent stories and miraculous events of Jesus’ ministry, as presented in the Gospel of Mark, demonstrate and embody holding space. In each healing, each casting out of demons, Jesus is present with the individual. No judgement. No conditions. Each context and experience are unique. You will recall a few weeks ago, some were healed by words sight unseen, others were physically touched.

Holding space --- Jesus takes the disciples aside, alone, to share information that will be challenging and difficult to digest. Jesus needs to provide a space where he can sit with the disciples without distractions. Where questions can be asked, where disciples can feel and process that Jesus is going to die to bring God’s kindom.

Holding space --- In Capernaum, Jesus creates and holds space in a conversation with the disciples, creating and holding space for the eavesdroppers in the room. By physically setting a child in the middle of the conversation Jesus expands what holding space means. In the safe circle of the disciples’ conversation, Jesus challenges those present and the listener to sit with and welcome the marginalized. In the 1^st century children were considered less than human, at best property. And here Jesus extends welcome.

 

Holding space --- I have never seen these words included in the job description of a pastor. Yet, most of what I do is a holding of space for others. Pastoral care visits, grief counseling, facilitating exploration in study groups, offering coffee and conversation, and sharing in worship and prayer.

 

In this specific space, during worship, although I move us through the liturgy it is not I that is entirely responsible for holding space. Holding space is a communal action and a communal ministry. This ministry requires a commitment from all of us: to show up, to be present, to welcome the child and the marginalized, to sit together, to listen, to pray, to sing, to share Christ’s peace – to be bodies that embody the Christ.

Sacred spaces. Communities that hold space are vital for the health and wellbeing of the wider community. This space is gift!

Thank you for holding space with me and participating in this ministry. It is a holy gift that you are giving to the world!

Holding space confounds and scares away some people. Over the 20 years I have served with you, there are those who have left because holding space was a foreign concept. Coming to church was understood and practiced as an individual pursuit, rewarded by personal acquisition whether in answered prayers, deeper faith, affirming beliefs, or accolades. Some people have left because they were not finding any personal value or reward. Missing the point, or choosing, to ignore that following Jesus is not about ME.

Our stories from Mark’s Gospel demonstrate Jesus holding space for the disciples, eavesdroppers, children, the marginalized. There are stories of Jesus holding space for himself – self-care, stepping aside – this action comes out of holding space for others, so that Jesus is able to continue to minister to and be in relationship with others. Jesus’ ministry for the most part is not about personal acquisition or storing up treasures for himself. Jesus’ life and death is about the other.

 

I am often asked, “What can I do? How can I serve?”

I believe that the single greatest ministry of a community of faith is providing a holy holding space for others.

Showing up for worship is ministry. And coming with an attitude and expectation, not to acquire value for yourself, but rather a perspective of holding space for others.

Consider ---

Today, you may not hear something you desperately wanted to hear, because you held space for someone else to hear what they needed to hear.

Today, you may leave without your questions or prayers answered, instead you held space for someone else to receive their daily bread.

Perhaps you will not hear something that challenges you, you held space for someone else who was challenged by what was said and it will change their life.

And you may leave feeling like you did not experience God today, remember you held space for someone else who did experience God.

 

As we hold space for each other, Christ is embodied and present. In this space through community, Word and Sacrament, grace washes over us, all of us – the whole space; and we are held in God's grace upon grace.

Healing and Wholeness - def'n - RELATIONSHIP

 

Ableism – Ableism is defined by accessliving.org as: discrimination of and social prejudice against people with disabilities based on the belief that typical abilities are superior. At its heart, ableism is rooted in the assumption that disabled people require ‘fixing’ and defines people by their disability.

Today’s readings invite us to consider and wrestle with our bias and prejudice around ableism; to ponder that each of us is one accident away from possible disability; to acknowledge that aging changes what we can and can not do. We are asked to deeply think about what healing and wholeness are.

 

The Isaiah text shares a familiar passage, repeated throughout prophetic texts: the eyes of the blind shall be opened, the ears of the deaf shall be opened; the lame shall leap like a deer, and the tongue of the speechless sing for joy. …the blind see, the deaf hear, the lame walk, the mute speak. Human interpretations of these images have led to conditions like blindness being seen as bad, a consequence of sin, at the very least, less than. Author Amy Kenny, who has a disability, wrote a book, “My Body Is Not a Prayer Request: Disability Justice in the Church” describing her experience of ableism in the church. She did not see herself as less than, she did not want or need prayers for healing.  She writes that the church because of its prejudice was missing out on the prophetic witness and blessing of disability.

 

If asked, would you agree or disagree with the statement: Blindness is something to be fixed.? Healed? I have met blind people who ‘see’ very well, with their ears and hands and intuitions. Ableism is the assumption of those who see with their eyes, that sightedness of the eyes is wholeness for the blind. The text from Isaiah helps solidify the assumption; the blind shall see.

 

Too often our idea of wholeness is equated or connected in our minds to a definition of perfection. What does it mean for something to be perfect. Perfection is a fickle thing, for it is based on perceptions, personal notions, or societal ideals of what ‘perfect’ is.

 

On that nice sunny warm autumn feeling afternoon this past week, I went for a run. It was wonderful, -dare I say perfect- both relaxing and rejuvenating. It was healing. It was exactly what my spirit and body needed. By this intro you would not have guessed that during the run I tripped and landed on the sidewalk. I skinned my knee and hand, road-rashed and bruised my shoulder. The run was not any less wholesome because I was hurt in the process.

 

There are many Christians who would describe Jesus as perfect. Jesus was also human. The Gospel for today suggests that while walking on earth, Jesus had some less than graceful moments; uncharitable even; others have called out Jesus’ prejudice. In the Gospel reading, healing and wholeness is found, not in the healings, as much as, in the heated conversation between the Syro-Phoenician woman and Jesus. The heated conversation is an open wound – where the woman is called dog. In the exchange of words, healing and wholeness arrive as Jesus’ perspective changes. Jesus is the one healed as his prejudice for this woman dissipates and he acts in compassion to heal her daughter. Jesus doesn’t become ‘perfect,’ but moves into a wholeness found in relationship and this new way of being changes Jesus’ approach to ministry. Jesus’ ministry journeys into wholeness as Jesus’ understanding of who is included in the invitation to God’s grace and unconditional love expands.

 

I read a commentary, that suggested that two very different healing stories are included here. The woman’s daughter is healed from afar at the request of the mother. The second has Jesus touching the deaf man and speaking to him. These two healing stories illustrate that faith journey, healing, is not the same for everyone. The stories and healings are distinct because each person has a distinct relationship with Jesus, with God.

I think about healing and wholeness in my work as pastor when called to pray, to visit the sick, and to be present in the ER. And then there are the times I have sat at bedsides of those who are 100% dying --- when a pastor is invited to come and pray, what kind of prayers do families want? What would you want me to pray for a loved one? Healing of the sick? Raising the dead? Safe passage?

My go-to is a prayer for healing to wholeness – in some cases the prayer is answered in bodily healing, for others it is the peace of death that comes through suffering, but far more often prayers for wholeness are answered in relationships – moments and miracles that happen between family members and friends at the bedside– miracles and moments that include forgiveness, confession, repentance, gratitude, remembrance, compassion, care, service, humility, love.

 

At our last National church assembly, the church received a report from the ELCIC Task Force Addressing Ableism.  In this report the Task Force wrote:

Disability is part of being human. It is a condition or experience from injury, illness, or a unique development which makes it more difficult for a person to engage in meaningful activity or interact with the world around them. Disability can be easily identifiable, invisible, temporary, and/or permanent and is not a fixed experience. Inclusion in our context is naming that all people are made in the image of God, and so living in relationship with each person as complete and valuable in and of themselves. Inclusion seeks to engage each person as they are in the whole of our church body and family. – ELCIC task force addressing ableism report 2022

Inclusion in our context is naming that all people are made in the image of God, and so living in relationship with each person as complete and valuable in and of themselves. Inclusion seeks to engage each person as they are in the whole of our church body and family.

The Task Force speaks of relationship – living in relationship the people of God are made whole. We are each valuable and complete as we are. We acknowledge that disability is part of being human. We are healed and whole when we are in relationship, being community, loving one another and letting others love us. Relationship in community has be think of two titles from authors writing about disability that speak to me about healing and wholeness:  Shane Clifton wrote, “Crippled Grace,” and Brian Brock wrote, “Wondrously Wounded.” As pastor, I listen and hear that which cripples and wounds. There are few in this community who have not been introduced to disability. We are a community of the wondrously wounded and expressions of crippled grace.

 

So, what do we do with the passages of scripture that have the blind seeing, the deaf hearing, the lame walking, the mute talking? We can keep reading!

These passages do not end in the dualism, God’s grace comes in what follows. Unfortunately, what follows is not what has stuck in our minds or settled into our hearts.

Today we keep reading, God’s grace is found in what follows in the image of water in the desert. Augsburg’s Sundays and Seasons resource has this to say:

Isaiah’s images of water in the desert can help us parse the nuances of this issue. In places marred by drought, water breaking forth is wholeness and shalom; streams of water in the desert’s rainy season allow for life the whole year long. And yet deserts are vital ecosystems teeming with life, and we ought not make deserts into marshes; part of the wholeness of creation is a diversity of creation. Likewise, part of shalom in the human community is a diversity of ability. Creation models a good human life.

 

We are each made in the image of God and loved by God. We are valuable and complete as we are. We are a community who is in relationship with each other and this diversity makes us whole. We are healed through relationship with each other and God; we are wondrously wounded and are beautiful expressions of crippled grace.

 

 

We pray with a prayer written by Rev. Steve Hoffard on the occasion of a joint meeting of the ELCIC Task Forces on ableism; homophobia; racism.

 

Creator God,

You have formed every one of us in your image. All of us molded as a unique and beautiful part of your diverse creation…each of us equally loved, valued and precious in your sight.

As a church we recognize that truth and sometimes even proclaim it while sadly at the same time erecting barriers, sometimes unknowingly, too often even knowingly, to those who differ from us in anyway.

We know we have work to do. As members of the body of Christ, we are called to help each other be a better church, we ask that you come among us not only today but in the days ahead as we continue this work.

Inspire us with courage and creativity. Challenge us to new learning. Push us when we get stuck.

Help us to listen carefully to one another and to those who have been pushed to the margins and give us strength to carry on even when the work is hard. This we continue to pray until all are included and celebrated without exception ... without obstacles ... and without endless debate. In the name of the one who fully welcomes all to the table, Jesus the Christ. Amen.

-Rev. Steve Hoffard (on occasion of joint meeting of ELCIC task forces: ableism; homophobia, biphobia, transphobia; racism, white supremacy, and racial justice. Nov. 2021)